COVID-19 Information - Click Here
Skip to Content
Homewatch CareGivers
LocationsIcon of Map Pin
  • Caregiver Jobs
  • Franchise Opportunities
  • Care Community Blog
  • Contact Us
close
  • Back
  • Home
  • About Home Care
    • Back
    • What is Home Care
    • Types of Care
    • Financing Options
    • Cost
    About Home Care Homewatch CareGivers® believes good care should not interfere with your quality of life. We deliver the compassionate care our clients need to help complete day-to-day activities while still maintaining a healthy dose of independence.
  • Types of Care
    • Back
    • Elder Care
    • 24-Hour Care
    • Child Care
    • Respite Care
    • Senior Transportation Services
    • Companion Care
    • Hospital Discharge
    • Chronic Conditions Care
    • Dementia Care
    • Nursing Services
    • After Surgery Care
    • Personal Care
    Types of Care Our clients have many different reasons for requiring care, so we strive to provide services tailored to their individual needs and circumstances. Homewatch CareGivers delivers various types of in-home care that focus on the whole person—not just their condition.
  • Resources
    • Back
    • ALS
    • Arthritis
    • Dementia
    • Developmental Disabilities
    • Diabetes
    • Heart Disease
    • Parkinson's Disease
    • Senior Safety
    • Stroke
    • For Health Care Providers
    • Ask The Experts
  • Our Story
    • Back
    • Team Bios
    • Facts & History
    • National Quality Forum
    • In the Media
    • Home Care Association of America
    Our Story Homewatch CareGivers was founded on the concept of person-directed care: focusing on the specific needs of the individual and treating each client as a whole person, not just a condition. We strive to provide in-home care services that allow people to continue living safely and happily in their own homes.
  • Why Choose Us?
    • Back
    • Our Caregivers
    • Questions to Ask
    • Homewatch CareGivers University
    • Client Testimonials
    • In-Home Senior Safety
    Why Choose Us? Let our family care for yours. At Homewatch CareGivers, we value not only highly qualified caregiving services but also human interactions and relationships. Our people make the difference.
LocationsIcon of Map Pin

Caregiving and Marriage

Caregiving and Marriage Oct 27, 2020
Blog Categories
  • COVID-19
  • A Business with a cause
  • Addressing Isolation & Loneliness
  • Age at home
  • Age in place
  • Aging at Home
  • Aging Parent
  • aging parents
  • animal therapy
  • Anxiety Support
  • Best Home Care
  • Care for Aging Parents
  • Care for My Aging Parent
  • Caregiver
  • Caregiver Assistance
  • Caregiver Stress
  • caregiving assistance
  • caring star
  • caring star award
  • caring.com
  • caring.com award
  • Coping and Caregiving
  • Coronavirus
  • Cost of Care
  • Dementia
  • dementia care
  • Elderly Parent Care
  • Employee Spotlight
  • Essential Caregiver Skills
  • Events
  • Falls Prevention
  • Family Caregiver
  • Financial Resources
  • Franchise
  • Franchising
  • handling caregiver stress
  • Health & Wellbeing
  • Holiday Celebration
  • Home Care
  • Home Watch Caregivers
  • Homewatch CareGivers
  • how to manage caregiver stress
  • In-Home Safety
  • Job Fair
  • Local
  • Long Term Care
  • Long Term Care Options
  • National Public Health Week
  • New Office in New Haven
  • older parents
  • parents aging
  • Parkinson’s Symptoms
  • Passion of Caregiving
  • Pet Therapy
  • Planning Ahead
  • Provider Choice Award
  • Senior Care & Aging
  • Senior Exercise
  • service dog
  • Social Distancing
  • stress
  • therapy dog
  • top rated home care agency
  • wandering

Caregiving and Marriage

Caregiving and relationship expert, Barry J. Jacobs, has a new book that focuses on marriage for people a couple of decades into their matrimonial journey. “Love and Meaning After 50” was written with Jacobs’ wife, Julia Meyer, who is also a psychologist.

We interview Jacobs on how this topic might relate to caregiving and especially for those who are feeling their marriage impacted by their role as a family caregiver.

HWCG: How does caregiving impact a marriage? Specifically, when one spouse becomes a family caregiver for a loved one, can it be detrimental to the marriage?

BJJ: Caregiving usually unbalances relationships. Well spouses often have to step up and do more to take over household and other duties that their ill spouses can no longer handle. They can feel frustrated and resentful because of that. Meanwhile, the ill spouses are hurting emotionally because of their reduced capabilities and increased dependence on the well spouses. They can become depressed, believing they are a burden. Or they can become resentful that the well spouses are now ordering them about and treating them like children. All of this undermines the relationship quality. Rather than pulling together to meet the challenges of dealing with a common foe—namely, the illness or disability—spouses can turn on one another. In the worse-case scenarios, I’ve seen well spouses leave their relationships. I’ve also seen resentful ill spouses do the same.

HWCG: What inspired you and your wife to write this book together now?

BJJ: As we entered our fifties and our children grew up and moved away from home, we realized we had to make adjustments in our relationship so that we were no longer so child-centered. We saw our friends going through similar changes. In our clinical practices, we each worked with couples who had been married for 30 years or more and then decided to break up. This was consistent with the national trend that has seen a doubling of divorce among couples over 50 in the last 20 years and a tripling of divorces in that time period for couples over 65. Opting out of a lukewarm or bad marriage isn’t necessarily a bad thing; it could be a big improvement for one or both spouses. But divorce at any age has many consequences—financial, emotional, and relational. We decided to write “AARP Love and Meaning After 50” to help couples strengthen their relationships and avoid those consequences or work toward amicable divorces with as little damage done as possible.

HWCG: What are the top 3 challenges for couples over 50 in their relationship?

BJJ: First and foremost is the challenge of taking a hard look at a long-term relationship that may have become static and stale over time. Secondly, couples have to be willing to renegotiate that relationship to refresh it for the next phase of life. Third—and this is true for couples at any age—they have to be able to listen to one another’s disappointments, resentments and peeves without reacting emotionally. That’s what it takes to form a new understanding of each other’s needs and make adjustments so that you’re both happier.

HWCG: Are there any parallels between the importance of communication in caregiving and in marriage?

BJJ: Communication is key in all social interactions. We aren’t mind readers, though we sometimes think we are. We can’t assume we know all that is going on inside the other person, even if we have been together with them for decades. By creating emotionally safe spaces in our lives for sharing honestly, listening patiently, and responding authentically, we become better caregivers and spouses. Our book has conversation guides and specific questions and exercises to help make those heartful exchanges possible.

Posted By Homewatch CareGivers
  • Share
Blog Home - Previous Post | Next Post
More Posts Like This
  • It’s a Match! Caregiver-Client Relationships
    Feb 24, 2021

    It’s a Match! Caregiver-Client Relationships

    Caregiving is about more than just one person fulfilling a list of a tasks; it’s about human relationships and connection.

    Read More
  • Top Five Types of Home Care
    Feb 24, 2021

    Top Five Types of Home Care

    Home care is not just one thing, but instead an umbrella term under which there are many types of care for many different types of needs and people. Learn about elder care, respite care, personal care, dementia care, and after-surgery care.

    Read More
  • Developmental Disabilities and Home Care
    Feb 24, 2021

    Developmental Disabilities and Home Care

    People who are living with developmental disabilities often need a professional caregiver in addition to family member support.

    Read More
Homewatch CareGivers Caregiving Services
Find Your Location Homewatch CareGivers is an equal opportunity provider and employer.
Help & Info
  • About Homecare
  • Types of Care
  • Financing Options & Programs
  • Our Resources
  • Owner Login
Our Company
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Caregiver Jobs
  • Blog
  • Franchise Opportunities
Other
  • National Homepage Homewatch CareGivers University Login Privacy Policy Site Map
  • Accessibility Notice
  • HIPAA Disclaimer
  • Do Not Sell My Information - California Residents
Follow Us On

Part of the Authority Brands Family

Authority Brands is the leading provider of in-home services, building brands that support the success of franchisees as well as better the lives of the homeowners we serve and the people we employ.
/
Copyright © 2021 | Homewatch CareGivers® is a trademark owned by Homewatch International, Inc.™ and licensed for use to independently-owned franchised businesses that offer caregiver services to the public. All personal services, elderly care, caregiving and home care services offered OR provided under the Homewatch CareGivers™ mark are offered and provided only by independently-owned franchises and, where required, licensed OR registered businesses and care agencies. Scorpion Franchise Internet Marketing
x

⚠

Your browser is out of date. To get the full experience of this website, please update to most recent version.

Update My Browser