Mindfulness is one of those words we hear more and more, but might not know what it means.
According to the Mayo Clinic, “mindfulness is the act of being intensely aware of what you’re sensing and feeling at every moment—without interpretation or judgment.”
According to Psychology Today, “mindfulness is a state of active, open attention the present.”
Jon Kabat-Zinn, PhD, founder of the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, has defined it as, “paying attention on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally, to the unfolding of experience moment to moment.”
So now you know what it is, but you aren’t sure why it matters. The benefits of practicing mindfulness include stress reduction, less negative thoughts, being in a better mood.
Practicing mindfulness is not the same as being mindful of others. Being mindful as a caregiver is more about looking after yourself so that you don’t become overwhelmed and neglect your well-being.
“When I talk about the importance of being a mindful caregiver, there are two things I think about,” says Nancy Kriseman, LCSW, author of The Mindful Caregiver. “The first is the caregiver recognizing the importance of how they are feeling in their mind, body and spirit. The other is being intentional about how they decide to take on this role.”
An AARP/National Alliance for Caregiving study found that 50% of family caregivers feel they have or had no choice in taking on the role of caregiver.
“Caregivers take on this role because they feel that they don’t have a choice, because they feel that they are the only person who can take care of their loved one, and other reasons,” says Ms. Kriseman. “What I find is that there are these entrenched caregiver beliefs—the “oughts” and the “shoulds”—and they project what they think the care recipient needs instead of getting more clarity.”
In her book, Ms. Kriseman walks the reader/caregiver a process to see how they got to the place where they are, which might include feeling stressed. “I ask, ‘Is this a role that comes easily to you?’ and ‘Does this take more of your energy than other things in your life?’ So it becomes more intentional through recognizing what your limitations are, what your realistic expectations are.”
Now for another question, how do you practice mindfulness? Ms. Kriseman suggests:
The Mayo Clinic offers a few different ways to practice mindfulness too. These can be as simple as paying attention to setting aside time daily to focus on breathing or meditating.
When it comes to embracing mindfulness as a caregiver, start with asking yourself questions.
“How can you look at ways to reduce stress so you don’t take on the entire thing as your job and you have to do everything?” Ms. Kriseman suggests. “When you’re more intentional, you can look at what is truly needed in this picture to help the care recipient and ask who might be supportive besides yourself and how can you involve other resources?"
The global spread of the novel coronavirus (COVID-19) has led to a lot of questions about alternatives to nursing homes with everyone now being asked to “social distance” and what it means to be safe, or safely cared for, during a pandemic.
Lisa Shultz was suddenly told that she could not visit her mother weekly because of new rules to help limit the spread of the novel coronavirus. Learn how she is coping and still connecting with her mom.
Elder care in a time of recommended isolation can be tricky for family and friends. See what's recommended to stay connected safely.